What is happiness? One definition according to Webster’s Dictionary is, “Enjoying, showing, or marked by pleasure, satisfaction, or joy.” Although, philosophers, religious leaders, and doctors have attempted to define happiness, it remains an illusive, intangible awareness or consciousness; a state of mind that one chooses despite external forces. Finding satisfaction with one’s self and one’s life may be a better interpretation. But how does one find her/his purpose?
Below are good starting points to create a life with purpose.
Step 1: Make a list of any and all aspirations from the past—what are the ones that haven’t been completed or started?
Most people have a mental assessment of goals they want to accomplish or dreams they want to realize. Self-help gurus such as Tony Robbins and Louise Hay tout the importance of writing down goals in order to realize them. Start a journal with a detailed list of goals or dreams. Narrow the list down to the three goals that are most meaningful. From those three, choose one that stands out as the most important and list a number of specific, active steps to begin toward turning that inspiration into reality.
Step 2: Take immediate action toward the most important goal.
If a goal is to become a writer, carve out 20 minutes a day and begin. If painting is an aspiration, buy a sketchbook and start. If it’s to get out of debt, write down all debts and determine how to cut back and begin to pay off the one with the highest interest rate. Want to find a lasting relationship? Choose one that is different from the last failed one. Get the picture? Once the mind accepts a new way of thinking, a domino effect begins. Let’s face it—the reason why life’s situations keep repeating is that most people keep relying on past behavior to seek different results. Benjamin Franklin said, “The definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results.”
Step Three: Volunteer or find a way to give back.
Giving feels good. Whether it’s an hour a week or an hour a month find a way to give. Studies indicate that those who give lead more fulfilling lives. In his book, The Healing Power of Doing Good, Allan Luks writes about a helper’s high. His theory is that having personal contact with a stranger (giving to someone outside family or friends) has the same effect as a runner’s high or engaging in meditation. Giving results in self-actualization, the term Maslow used in his “Hierarchy of Needs,” to define “the full realization of one’s potential.” Part of realizing life’s purpose is realizing potential.
Step Four: Imagine the end of your life, surrounded by family and friends. Goals have been completed; dreams realized. What is that most important accomplishment or dream?
This is a tough one, but necessary. It’s difficult to think about dying. Most people put their dreams on hold. They believe that someday they’ll have the time to pursue them. Someday never comes. Each time a person begins to seek that which is at the core of who they are and doesn’t follow through, an unconscious decision is made that in turn, reflects that decision.
Creating a life with purpose is an individual and very personal choice. Choosing to follow a dream takes dedication and hard work. Employing these techniques, which may seem daunting at first, will kick start the process of focusing on what is important and what once was important. The result is a productive and fulfilling life.
References: Volunteerism, What Makes America Great by John Bridgeland, Business Week Advertising Section.
Abraham Maslow’s Hierarchy of Needs
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