How to Be Happy:Get True Happiness
Feel Good with these Self Help Tools from Positive Psychology
Dec 11, 2007
Recent findings from the research studies of positive psychology scientists are useful to anyone searching for how to be happy. The following 15 self help tools can help you feel good and succeed in your quest for true happiness.
Positive Psychology Findings
With the advent of research applying rigorous scientific studies to the question of how to be happy, positive psychologists have concluded that anyone can move toward greater happiness. These self help tools for being happier are easy to use, cost nothing, and offer benefits well beyond the effort required to implement them.
- Happiness Expectations: It is unrealistic to expect continuous joy as everyone will have emotional highs and lows in their lives. Both highs and lows are temporary; scientists find that we tend to return to a natural happiness set point. Each individual's set point is not a fixed point, but a range, which is variable based on voluntary activities such as those following.
- Gratitude: Each day, recall three things that occurred for which you are grateful. Savor these memories and why you appreciate them. As well, form the periodic habit of expressing gratitude to someone. If at all possible, express it in person.
- Core Strengths: We are at our best, and happiest, when using our strengths. Find new ways to incorporate your strengths in daily activities.
- Altruism: Generosity feels good. The giver and receiver benefit and studies show generosity is good for your health, too.
- Goals: Pursue goals that are meaningful and pleasurable. The process of pursuing meaningful goals may provide more happiness than the accomplishment.
- Relationships: Close, nurturing, equitable, and intimate relationships are a significant contributor to happiness, good health, and long life.
- Meaning: Pursue a life of meaning, which is a personal determination; one size doesn't fit all
- Learning: Grow, learn new skills, and face new challenges to maintain energy, direction, and purpose.
- Go with the Flow: Engaging in activities that are challenging, meaningful, and utilize core strengths and skills results in flow, where time stands still and your focus is entirely on the task at hand. Flow activities are extremely satisfying.
- Work Activities: Maximize your work satisfaction by using a variety of skills, do a complete task, and pick tasks that are significant.
- Calling: The most satisfying work feels like a calling and uses strengths, is meaningful, and pleasurable.
- Expressive Writing: Write about what is important in your life, what you've learned, what has shaped your life, what you value, and what you'd like to pass on to others.
- Exercise: Physical exercise stimulates the production of brain chemicals producing good feelings. Exercise also strengthens the immune system and heightens one's confidence and self esteem.
- Positive Reminiscence: Refrain from dwelling on negative past events; they're past. Recall and savor the positive memories you have. Play them over and over, enjoying the positive feelings the memories provide.
- Forgiveness: Forgiveness is a gift to yourself, allowing you to put aside the hurt, bad memories, and negative feelings associated with recalling wrongs done to you. Holding anger and other negative feelings serves to submerse you in the negative event over and over again. Forgive to forget and move toward true happiness.
For more on how to be happy, see The Pursuit of Happiness.
References:
Martin Seligman, Ph.D., Authentic Happiness: Free Press, 2002
Tal Ben-Shahar, Ph.D., Happier: McGraw Hill, 2007
Robert Biswas-Diener & Ben Dean, Positive Psychology Coaching: John Wiley & Sons, 2007
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