Positive Messaging Leads to Growth
Your mind does not distinguish between believing and doing so talk yourself into the person you want to become.
May 10, 2006
Self talk is what you say when you talk to yourself. Are you even aware that you talk to yourself--nearly continuously? You do, we all do. Self talk takes place thousands of times a day, every day. What does this have to do with personal development? Your personal development is directly affected by self talk. Your growth and development is hindered or enhanced by what you say when you talk to yourself. Are you your own best friend or your worst enemy? Does your self talk sound like this?
- That was a stupid thing to do!
- Can't you do anything right anymore?
- Well, you did it again, you big dummy!
Sound familiar? If this is what you say when you talk to yourself maybe it's time to consider hanging out with someone else. Would you continue to be with another person who talked to you this way? Probably not, most of us would end that "friendship" pretty quickly. This may seem silly, but many people do really talk to themselves just like this example. Their self talk is demeaning, dismissive, and unsupportive. Consider this. What if you made a mistake, a natural human error, and someone close to you said:
- Oh, you just made a silly mistake, but you hardly ever make mistakes so you probably won't do that again.
- We all make mistakes like that at some time.
- It's no big deal.
That would feel pretty good, wouldn't it? You'd feel supported and valued because you just made an honest, human mistake. Wouldn't it be nice to have someone supportive like this around all the time? You can. You can be that supportive someone with your own self talk. Why wait for someone else, when the most effective supporter is right there with you all the time? Why is this so important? Research shows that there is very little difference in your brain activity between doing something and imagining that you've done it. So whether you make lots of mistakes or make one mistake and reproach yourself over and over, to your mind it's all the same. If you repeatedly tell yourself that you're stupid, your mind believes it just as if you did something stupid over and over. Your self talk is continuously forming your self image--who you are. What you say when you talk to yourself really does matter. If you're serious about personal development, get serious about talking positively and supportively to yourself. Be your own best friend. You deserve it.
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